View Full Version : Paraguay 820
Umano Spa 4893-1307
10am-8pm Mon-Fri, 10am-2pm Sat
Clean massage parlor 2 blocks from Exedra, 80 pesos for hour massage.
I selected Lorena, who actually studied massage for two years. I got a fantastic massage and was offered sex in exchange for an unspecified propina. Sex was good,but Im not a fan of massage table sex.
All the girls photos are on www.gemidos.com.ar in the massage section.
Next time I come to BsAs,this will be my first stop after that long plane ride!
Nice recommendation on the spa from Seismo. Thanks!
I wish I had remembered Lorena's name yesterday - got Mariel, who gave a lack-luster massage and no happy ending! :( AVOID! (My preferred masseuse - see next paragraph - wasn't working, and I had to take what was offered.)
OTOH, a few days earlier, got an energetic and excellent massage from Jessica, who told me "el relax es incluado en el precio" and was (truly!) disappointed when I declined (Ella: "Crees que yo soy fea." Yo: "No es la verdad, amor!"). She even got up on top of me and straddled me, forcefully working on my sore neck.
My Spanish wasn't good enough for me to have explained that I was practicing Exon123's "sperm management" in expectation of a hot date later that day. She's a bit of a hefty babe, though, so your preferences may vary. (Since my eyes are closed during my massages, I care more about the girl's massage technique than her appearance!)
http://escorts.gemidos.com.ar/?id=escorts&ct=4&pb=4046
http://escorts.gemidos.com.ar/?id=escorts&ct=4&pb=4046
Wow Hunt, she is a real cutie!!! How could you turn her down? Sperm Management or not, I would certainly save some leche for her. She is on my list for my next trip. :)
Sportsman
Sportsman, those photos are misleading. She's a good deal more chunky than they let on. But she certainly was pleasant, and gave a great massage - good enough that I asked for her on a subsequent visit, as you see, and was disappointed with her replacement.
Member #1164
06-09-05, 12:10
I visited this place a couple weeks back and chose lorena.
http://escorts.gemidos.com.ar/?id=escorts&ct=4&pb=3963&ph=7
she looks almost like her fotos and her massage and service were great. She said to 2 shots on goal 1 manual and the other sex, while she blowing me I was fingering her and she got wet and really horny so she jumped on top and rode me and played with herself till she came. Very nice service. If I remember right it was 120 peso more on top of the massage.
I visited this place a couple weeks back and chose Lorena.
http://escorts.gemidos.com.ar/?id=escorts&ct=4&pb=3963&ph=7
She looks almost like her fotos and her massage and service were great. She said to 2 shots on goal, 1 manual and the other sex. While she blowing me I was fingering her and she got wet and really horny so she jumped on top and rode me and played with herself till she came. Very nice service. If I remember right it was 120 peso more on top of the massage.I'm glad somebody had a good time with her. For me, Lorena was a total dud.
The entrance to this place actually is a storefront on Paraguay street level, no bell, apartment number, stairs, and elevator needed. Really wanted to check out Yessica even though Hunt99 mentioned she is chunkier in person then the pictures shown. But she was not working both times I was there.:(
First visit was last Friday afternoon around 6:00 pm, paid the receptionist 80 pesos to the house for the hour. (BTW the receptionist is very hot, did not quite catch her name sounds like Pamela but that's not it) I was presented with Lorena. The massage room is clean but small, has enough space for the massage table and not much else. Lorena gave a good massage for about 20 minutes working on my backside, then she hopped on the table and started to straddle me while I was still laying on my stomach. She nibbled on my ears and kissed my neck with some tongue action. Well that's the end of the massage. Without saying a word about prices and types of the service, the remaining time was spent on DFK, bbbj, DATY, and various positions. When I was done, she asked for 100 pesos for the service. It was my first day back to BsAs and I have not hit the ATM yet. I was still living off the left over cash from my last trip, so I had less than 100 pesos by that time. Then she said 70 pesos were ok.
On the last day of this trip, initially I wanted to visit a privado before leaving for the airport. But I was running late and I only had less than 90 minutes before Ana was to pick me up at the hotel. Since this place is only two blocks from the hotel, I decided to drop my last load here instead. Again Yessica was not working at that time, the receptionist told me choices are Lorena again, Sofia, and Carolina (the receptionist still looks hot) I asked for Carolina. She gave a very nice and professional massage for about 30 minutes. After I flipped over on my backs she asked me what additional services I wanted. She offered manual (HJ) bbbj, cbj, and full service. I could not understand the prices for each. Since I was running tight on time so I told her I just wanted HJ. I got DFK, sucking on her tits, gave her some digits along the way. In the end I gave her 40 pesos. I probably overpaid because I think HJ is included in the 80 pesos entrance fee, but she is a very sweet girl and gave me a good massage.
Overall nice experiences and is recommended. I might pay another visit on my next trip. But I also want to check out other places too.
I saw the pictures of Carolina on the Internet and decided to give a try.
http://www.alrojo.com.ar/escort/958/f4.php
http://escorts.gemidos.com.ar/?id=escorts&ct=4&pb=3927&ph=4 (maybe it is another girl. Does anyone know?
The place is as described by Sportsman below, one of the cleanest I ever saw. I was also greeted by a very hot receptionist and introduced to Lorena, who presented me the 2 available girls. One was Majo and the other, Carolina. Ar$55 for 30 minutes and ar$70 for one hour. Chose the first.
She looks like in the pictures, a little chubbier perhaps, but undeniably beautiful and, above all, fresh and young (she claims 21, which is believable)
The massage was very good, and before the end of the session she provided her "à la carte" options. Ar$55 for CBJ and ar$80 for full service, all covered. I negotiated ar$75 for BBBJ.
She seemed a little nervous about the short remaining time, and, even though she acepted my offer, wasn't very much convinced of doing so. In any case, she managed to make me finish well, but no deep throat.
Ar$130 for a BBBJ and a massage is a little bit too much, but this is the price you pay when you go to massage parlors: Decide on the spot (no time for second thoughs) and keep your action on time.
Good for massages, but a little bit out of base for sex.
Hope this helps,
Andres
Andres,
This is the Carolina I had last month mentioned in my report. She does not look like the one you found on the internet. This one is more homey looking. I did not see her pictures on the internet.
Sportsman
Sportsman:
The Carolina I mentioned was exactly the girl of your picture. Maybe the girls advertised on the Internet are different ones, or the pictures were twicked. Who knows.
Thanks for the picture.
Andres
60 pesos / hour for massage plus tip for any additional services.
I selected Belen, spinner with big rack, and got a good massage and better sex. She works days, 10am-6pm Mon-Fri. Highly recommended!
I do not see this spa reported anywhere so after a visit today, I feel people should know about it.
The place is in Paraguay 800ths. You will not miss it as it has the front door to the street (just in front of the parking lots) What I liked about is that the place looks completly legit, it advertises as a full spa and it has solar beds in the front side of the operation. However, the good stuff is at the back. I asked for a massage and they took me to the back where there seems to be 4 to 5 well appointed rooms with the real massage table. The hour costs 60 pesos. There are 4 to 5 girls working there (I thought they were 4-6 at best) pick one and enjoy. They all provide extra service for 100 pesos more, cover BJ and at least the one I had was a good GFE.
The best part is that you do not need to wait in the street to be buzzed in or have to make an appointed, just walk ins. I would recomended to any one that wants some massage and a complete change of oil on the run. Bests
There is a thread titled "Paraguay 820" here for this place.
DonRoberto
11-05-07, 17:03
After passing on the Blue Center, which just seemed to be a massage table in a hot, airless room, I went around the corner to 820 Paraguay. 90 pesos for a one hour massage, which I took with a hot little brunette named Belem, though all the five girls were good-looking. Was all very nice, she was very acrobatic and sincere, and did a nice CBJ, with a missionary finish. I found she was a little greedy, as she asked for 150 pesos at the end (she did not get it)
She said they get very few English-speakers, but I would recommend it.
Big Boss Man
11-22-07, 14:35
As noted below, Belen is still a fine performer and fun. Massage was not that great.
Phone number is 4393-3452. There were five chicas in the lineup when I went.
http://www.masajes.com.ar/belen/index.html
As noted below, Belen is still a fine performer and fun. Massage was not that great.
Phone number is 4393-3452. There were five chicas in the lineup when I went.
http://www.masajes.com.ar/belen/index.htmlBig Boss Man,
Did you have Belen at 820 Paraguay? Because Belen in your link works out of the privado at Paraguay 930.
http://www.argentinaprivate.com/forum/showthread.php?t=4160
Big Boss Man
11-25-07, 00:42
Sportsman,
I had three addresses that afternoon when I went out looking. My game plan was I would go to 820 Paraguay and get a massage and then go to one of two privados which included 930 Paraguay. I chose 930 Paraguay because of what I read on the Board and was thinking about Belen. To my surprise when they showed the lineup at 820 Paraguay one of the chicas was Belen. I asked if she was on the Internet in my weak Spanish. She said that she was before. I could have lost something in the translation but I am fairly certain it is the same chica. She is on the wild and energetic side.
Perhaps that phone number and web link is for 930 Paraguay but Belen has moved to 820 Paraguay. 820 Paraguay has an entrance on the street and you walk a long hallway to the receptionist. I think it was next door to church which I remember thinking could never happen in the USA.
Pretty much sucked. I chose Augustina because she was flirty and made lots of eye contact. That's usually a pretty good sign. Massage starts and it's not bad. It's not good either, though, but I was okay with that. She asks me to roll over and tells me 120p for sexo. I laugh and tell her it's too much. We agree on 100p, which was still too much, but okay. Sex was absolutely uninspired. What a drag.
Belleza: 6.0 - Cute enough face, but thick.
Sexo: 3.0 - Uninspired. I've had elevator rides that were more fun.
Onda: 5.0 - Started great but went south quickly.
Privado: 7.5 - Nice place.
Masaje: 4.0 - At least she didn't hurt me.
* * * * * * *
Total: 5.1 - Caca. Maybe I'll try someone else because the place was nice.
WorldTravel69
04-04-08, 16:00
On the door it says 70p. She said the prices went up. OK I can except that. 90p for an hour. There were only 2 chicas working. At night 6 chicas. The only chica available was Augustina. Big tits, not that it mattered. I wanted a good massage, and a hand job finish. Meanwhile the chica next door was getting her rocks off. Lots of moaning. She gave me a good massage for about 30 minutes or so. Then she rubs my dick and says more money for HJ, 50p more. I said it is included, she said no. She wanted 100p for BJ. I said finish the massage. She went out to talk to the head chica. She came back and did not finish the hour. So after arguing for about 10 minutes and a phone call to the boss the chica at the desk gave me back 30p.
I hate this place. I wouldn't place it in the "rip-off" category, but it is terrible. The rooms are more like cubicles and you can hear a pin drop in the one next door. It's nice and clean, but it's a Croix VIP wannabe with rooms half as nice, girls half as pretty and prices higher. Don't go.
The only girl that was good here was Belem. Her name is Romina. Nice girl. She quit a few months ago. She lives in Quilmes. I still still see her once in a while. Since then, Umano doesn't have much to offer. The girls are indifferent and lazy. Not worth going here anymore. It's my opinion.
ComeOnDown
07-21-08, 10:51
I used to frequent this place because of its nice facilities. However, if you want stuff other than a massage then be prepared to be milked by the chicas here. I think its part of their training to get as much money as possible from their clients for other services.
This place is a rip off. They charge for an hour but you only get 30 minutes. They say the time includes your shower, when you change, when you get dressed again, etc. (Both me and the guy before me got treated this way)
They charge 100pesos for a massage and 200 for sex, and if you say no, they get angry.
The girl was coughing continuously and gave me a virus which ruined the rest of my holiday.
In other words - this place is bad news.
It gets worse and worse - it now belongs in the rip off category
Gato Hunter
07-23-08, 06:50
Can you explain how you got ripped off?
I arrived and they said 90 peso for 3/4 hour or 100 for the hour. I chose the hour and was then taken to my room and told to undress and a girl would soon come. I waited for 8 minutes and the girl finally comes in only to find she has run out of massage cream so she leaves to get more - it takes another 5 minutes. Little did I know but this is all included in my hour ie: 13 minutes have passed and I havent even had one hand on me.
The girl finally arrives. She's wearing a great outfit but coughing like crazy (She gave me a virus which ruined my first week of holiday) After a 5 minute massage she says its 200 pesos for sex, bringing it to 300 all up.
By this stage I'm feeling a little uncertain and when I said no she offered me a hand job for a 100 and said she would open her top so I could see her breasts. When I said no she said the massage was over.
I complained, she got stroppy and then she left the room for 5 minutes again. Finally she comes back - gives me a 10 minute massage then says 'time is up.
I complain but she says that the hour includes the shower. I walk out and see the guy who arrived before me also about to have a shower. His massage also only lasted 30 minutes (but he had sex)
Both the girl and the receptionist said a one hour massage only means 30 minutes with the girl as it includes shower and time changing.
I arrived and they said 90 peso for 3/4 hour or 100 for the hour. I chose the hour and was then taken to my room and told to undress and a girl would soon come. This doesn't sound all that different from my couple of experiences there. The place really is a borderline rip-off. I would never, ever, ever go there again when there are three quite good places to get a massage nearby. Jackson, you may want to consider putting this on an AVOID list.
Dancesw/Chicas
07-25-08, 14:08
I was there last month.
They told me 80 or 90, however if I wanted a hand job it was going to cost me 80 pesos more.
I asked her how much will it be, if I wanted her to smile a little more, and she said, regulary she gets 100 pesos tips. Reading her boby language, I knew she was a liar.
DWC
WorldTravel69
11-30-13, 15:42
Here is a good post from Esten:
"On a tip from WT69, in the afternoon I checked out Humano Spa at Paraguay 820. I think I have been to this place many years ago (either here or a couple doors on either side, but probably this exact same place). But the place has had significant renovations and IMO now has the best facilities of any spa I have been to in BA. You get buzzed in and walk down a long hall to the reception desk. The lady will take you to one of the rooms and soon after the chicas will come in one by one. The room was clean and upscale, with a very wide, comfortable massage table, jacuzzi and shower all in the same room. The shower has nozzles to make the water come down from above or sideways from the stainless steel manifold. Everything looked fairly new and high end. The lineup was excellent, six chicas in the 7.5.8.5 range. I chose a hot young morocha by the name Lucia. You pay 220 pesos for 1 hour in the room which includes 20 minutes of massage. Whatever you want to do with the rest of the hour is up to you, another 220 pesos will get you whatever else you want from the chica. Got a regular massage, then sensual, BBBJ and turca finish. Relaxed in the jacuzzi with her at the end. This place is top notch. Better furnishings and more attractive chicas than Unplugged or Armony. At 440 pesos for the hour, it's also a better deal than E-VIP. A big thanks to WT69 for sending me the link."
http://www.humanospa.com/
http://www.humanospa.com.ar/mendayspa.htm
I stopped by after a long, hot day on a whim around 4 PM. I really thought I had the wrong place. It's bright and clean and professional.
The girl at the front desk explained that it was 220 for 20 minutes of massage and the room for an hour. I could then negotiate special technical massages with the girl after the first 20 minutes, with prices ranging from 220 to 260.
Five or six girls came into a little room to say Hi. Some of them joked around when they said Hi and all seemed upbeat and perky. No one below a 6.5 and no one above 7.5. Young and friendly.
It really felt a bit like going to a dentist, but not quite clinical, just well organized and put together. That is, if your dentist gives you an enthusiastic massage, nice chit chat, a great CBJ and a few positions before telling you to ask for her again the next time you come back. I didn't ask about extras. I really was just happy to relax and have a little fun.
Balls Deep
12-13-13, 14:20
Based on recommendations here, I visited Humano's Spa at around 7 PM last night, a Thursday.
They buzz you in, you gaze down a long hallway with a reception desk at the end. The girl has no English, I comprendo the $220. Per hour deal and she takes me to a room with new modern shower and funky massage table, its small but clean.
I ask to see the chica's before I pay the $220 and one by one they enter the room. Few things in life are as interesting as a parade of sperm recipient candidates, LOL.
Number one was overweight with big ass tits, she was a cow and not for me, I don't moo. Number two was less kilos but not attractive in any way. Now I'm thinking, how do I bolt out of here gracefully, these these girls are brutal. Number three was a revelation, super cute 21 year old blonde with short hair and a hard sculpted body. Her ass looked like chiseled marble, perfect, sold.
The massage sucked, she offered boom boom for $250 and something about a blow job for something extra, no fucking idea what she was offering, I said the $250 deal was great and went balls deep into a delicious 21 year old beauty. Another delightful adventure in BSAs, I love this city.
I highly recommend this place, total cost in USD, less than $50 dollars, AWESOME!
WorldTravel69
12-13-13, 20:05
See guys, Jackson and I can agree on something.
Nice post and funny.
AllIWantIsLove
12-14-13, 03:09
The web site says: Teléfono: 0810 555 Humano (4862).
But that doesn't look anything like the many other BsAs telephone numbers I have seen.
Thanks, Bob.
Went at 5 pm. 6 chicas. However, I liked only one. An 8. The rest were below 6. Nice place, very clean, great showers and ambience. Costs 220 door price and then another 220 for full service including BBBJ. I skipped the massage and went straight for the good stuff. Girl was cute. About 22 yrs old and full GFE. Sorry, I don't remember her name. All in all, good place and well worth a visit.
AllIWantIsLove
01-16-14, 01:20
Today's frustration part II (for part I see my Magic Hands report).
I visited this place mainly because of what I have heard here about the facilities. I can only comment on the room they put me in but yes it had a very large tub with water jets and a great shower. But the poor workmanship detracts from the place. Why go to the expense of a large tub and they cut corners on the workmanship.
Anyway ... The lineup, 4 or 5 girls, was pretty much average, no great beauties, no pigs. I chose the one with the nicest face, Karen. A big mistake. Karen would not shower with me before the massage. Shit! I'm the customer and the shower is right there, but she would't budge. So I let her start the massage. No oil! Now maybe some people prefer creama but I really prefer oil. After no more than 3-4 minutes of massage she wanted to know what extras I wanted. I told her that I would like to undress her and that all I needed was a handjob. So she promptly starts to undress herself! And this is when I discovered how slimming black can be. Not that she was a porker, but she sure looked a lot thinner with her clothes on. So she starts with the worst handjob I've ever had. After telling her to slow down and be more gentle she's finally giving me an ok, although not great, HJ. But I guess things are not moving along fast enough for her because after about 3-4 minutes she gets out a condom and puts it on me and start a blowjob. Well, that's ok, I'm not going to object since her handjob wasn't doing much for me anyway. But when she began the blowjob I had to tell her that I was already circumcised and to be careful about her teeth. And she did. She knew how to get her teeth out of the way but just hadn't bothered. So with her teeth out of the way the blowjob was acceptable. But apparently things were still not moving along fast enough for her so she climbed up on the table to ride me. Worst fuck of my life! If my dick is not going in and out, in my opinion, it's not fucking. So after a bit of that, along with some really terrible acting, she gave up on that and asked me if I wanted her cola. I declined that and she went back to a handjob. I told her slow but she was determined to pump me faster than is my preference. I was holding her wrist with all of my strength and she either didn't catch on or didn't care. Finally I did come. I was relieved just to have it over with.
With the right girl you can probably have a nice time at this place. But Karen was sure not the right girl for me.
I asked and was told that the photos of the girls who work here are not available on the internet. And the receptionist confirmed that the very strange looking phone number here, 0810 555 4862, is correct.
Bob.
My experience at the P820 was very good. I was there last week.
Arrived at 7 pm, recptionist asked whether it was my first tine I said yes.
Quick introduction to the house rules, 220 $ for half an hour massage, extre time and "extra kind of massage" to be agreed with the girl. I ask how many chicas they had available, she replies two busy, two available. Kind ok limited choice. Ok then, let's give a look. I'm quite selective, and In this kind of situations I'm normally ready to walk away if what I see is not satisfactory.
The house girl drives me along the hallaway, first or second door to the left. Not spacious, but confortable, with a big shower / jacuzzi, and a proper massage bed. She left saying I send you the girls.
Enter the first one. Not that she was a pig, but definitely overweight. Good face, though, nice boobs, but surely not my type. Hola, kiss, she tells her name, adios!
Grow being more skeptical about my chances of having a sperm relief in this place.
Second one, a more petite girl, firm body (but was difficult to say as they are fully dressed up) very pretty face, smiling in complicity. Nice lips, short hair, small breast. Ok, I would have preferred a tittier one, but she passed the examination. Definitely a 7. And the attitude convinced me.
Asked me to shower and leave the room for two minutes.
When she's back, I am already on the bed.
Massage begins, and it's not bad. Uses cream, puts good pressure in the right points. Little conversation, my poor spanish is sufficient, she laughs, good feeling.
The massage covers legs and feet as well, very relaxing.
After maybe 20 minutes she asked me la vuelta (to turn), which I promptly do. No towel is covering my friend and she gives a quick look and smile while keeping on caressing my chest.
She finally asks if I want some more massage and I reply definitely yes, but I want to know whay's included and she says bocal (BJ) and penetration. Very straightforward!
I agree for 250 $.
I start touching her and help undressing. Small but firm tits, a be-cup, nice nipples I play with, she starts kissing, soft lips, good work with the tongue, really GF as she keeps on caressing my little bro and looking straight into my eyes.
Her panties are off and she sits on the bed, where I give her daty (clean, good smell) and she moans. We keep on playing for some minutes.
Then she covers my bro and starts a good BJ.
Some 69 until I cannot resist as I want to go inside her.
We start with her riding, she is good, chnge the pace, looks in yr eyes, then kisses you like your new girlfriend. We change the position, doggy first, and she moans like she's having a real orgasm. I pump her for maybe another 10 minutes and we switch again cause I want to see her face. Good actress or real I cannot say, but she surely seems to enjoy. Me too, and finally explode inside her.
Name: Natalia.
Age:23?
Tits:6.
Body:7.
Ass:7.
Face:8.
GF:9.5.
Overall exp:7.5 (fully suggested).
Damage: 470 $.
Enjoy!
Big Boss Man
05-19-14, 16:24
I went here on May 19,2014. The facility is one of the best for massage of any I have been to in BA. Very clean and every room has a jacuzzi and shower. Practices are still the same however. Girl gave a ten minute body rub as compared to massage and went straight to sex. She gave an above average BBBJ which always has something to be said for it. She pulled off as I was coming so no CIM.
I was there early so only one girl in the line up named Sol. She was petite where I like them taller and leggier. Quite cute with a two or three small tattoos. She's a solid provider on the massage circuit.
I paid 280 P to the facility and 300 P to the girl.
If they would change their service model just slightly I would say this would be a go to place. I do appreciate the cleanliness and will pay up for it.
Thanks to Esten, I found this place. Hands down best "spa" in town. You can see my posts ranging from Colmegna to Esmaralda spas etc. The facilities are top notch. Love the jacuzzi in the room. One hour is 300 and girls are asking 350 for complete. A bit pricey but worth it, especially when we have BA at 40% discount due to Blue rates. I went there three times in a week and I am in love with a girl from there. Nataly. She is amazing..decent massage. DFK (YMMV) DATY and very easy going.
Great updates Vitrea, thanks. Glad to hear this place is still open. BTW, there is another thread for this place titled Paraguay 820:
http://www.argentinaprivate.com/forum/showthread.php?2155-Paraguay-820
Thanks to Esten, I found this place. Hands down best "spa" in town. You can see my posts ranging from Colmegna to Esmaralda spas etc. The facilities are top notch. Love the jacuzzi in the room. One hour is 300 and girls are asking 350 for complete. A bit pricey but worth it, especially when we have BA at 40% discount due to Blue rates. I went there three times in a week and I am in love with a girl from there. Nataly. She is amazing..decent massage. DFK (YMMV) DATY and very easy going.I am looking for a "real" deep tissue massage from a formally trained masseuse on Sunday afternoon. I usually do 3 hours. A good time at the end would be great, but I can get that elsewhere so the massage quality is what really counts for me.
Is this a good place for that or is there better?
Any particular recommendations for the lady?
Thanks.
TejanoLibre
11-11-14, 22:41
I am looking for a "real" deep tissue massage from a formally trained masseuse on Sunday afternoon. I usually do 3 hours. A good time at the end would be great, but I can get that elsewhere so the massage quality is what really counts for me.
Is this a good place for that or is there better?
Any particular recommendations for the lady?
Thanks.Try to get in touch with "Kevins.".
He knows massage !
I personally never waste valuable poking time on a massage but I sure could use a good one !
Best massage is on Parana and Corrientes but it's a Dude !
TL.
I am looking for a "real" deep tissue massage from a formally trained masseuse on Sunday afternoon. I usually do 3 hours. A good time at the end would be great, but I can get that elsewhere so the massage quality is what really counts for me.
Is this a good place for that or is there better?
Any particular recommendations for the lady?
Thanks.Call me 15 66231235 and i can explain about one good female massue i know.
I think I will try this place when I am in BA next week. So, if you know no Spanish, do have a chance of getting there, getting what you want, and getting out?
Do you call them or just show up?
- So, Paraguay 820 is the address a taxi could take me to. Correct? Then what?
- I suspect once in I can navigate the menu.
- When done, will they call me a taxi to get back to Polermo?
I do not believe this place is open on Sundays. But if it is, you won't need them to call you a taxi. There will be plenty. Write your address in Palermo on a piece of paper to show to the taxi driver. BTW the cross street for Umano is Esmeralda. Between Suipacha and Esmeralda. 'Massage' is almost the same in Spanish: 'Mah-SAH-hay.'
I do not believe this place is open on Sundays. But if it is, you won't need them to call you a taxi. There will be plenty. Write your address in Palermo on a piece of paper to show to the taxi driver. BTW the cross street for Umano is Esmeralda. Between Suipacha and Esmeralda. 'Massage' is almost the same in Spanish: 'Mah-SAH-hay.'Thanks for the response.... So, there will be a sign on a storefront as opposed to an apartment with a buzzer?
I looked up the location and it looks to be about a 10 minute or so walk from meetings I will attend near Hilton. Is this area safe for a gringo to walk?
Yes safe and easy to find.
Number is clearly marked outside, the door was open and it looked like a spa inside.
Name is Spa Humano, they don't pronounce the H.
Enjoy!
I looked up the location and it looks to be about a 10 minute or so walk from meetings I will attend near Hilton. Is this area safe for a gringo to walk?
Anybody know their hours of operation?
Are they open on Sunday?
Thanks.
I just told you they were closed on Sundays.
Umano Spa 4893-1307 4393-1307. Cell: 15 5 747-5842.
10am-8pm Mon-Fri, 10am-2pm Sat.
These same hours are repeated in numerous places, so I conclude they are closed on Sundays. You could splurge a dollar or so on a round trip subway ride from Palermo to find out, and then everyone would know. Right?
I just told you they were closed on Sundays.
Umano Spa 4893-1307 4393-1307. Cell: 15 5 747-5842.
10am-8pm Mon-Fri, 10am-2pm Sat.
These same hours are repeated in numerous places, so I conclude they are closed on Sundays. You could splurge a dollar or so on a round trip subway ride from Palermo to find out, and then everyone would know. Right?I will check it out.... Thanks.
Keep Private
11-21-14, 16:25
Hello AP, this is my first post and I want to start off by thanking all the senior guys for their depth and breadth of sharing. I was in BA last week for a brief few days and had some time in the afternoon. First stop, Florida Street for my cambio. I got 13 on 150. After reading this board I cruised by Cafe O. Nothing remotely interesting so decided to try Humano. As reported, place is decent. My weak spanish was more than enough for the presentation parade. Keep in mind, it is only 2pm, so my expectations were reasonable. One by one, 6 chicas were presented...all nice to very nice. I picked Julieta, pretty face, 27 with an unbelievable body. If you are looking for a massage go somewhere else, this was sub par- but who cares. With "la vuelto" the fun began and she was fantastic. Hard, firm ass..perfect. Long story short I had a great time and would recommend. Damage 300 P for room and 350 P for Julieta. A very fair exchange.
Realizing my luck I had exactly 1300 P remaining so....went to get a bite to eat and a cerveza. By the time I was done I was ready for another masaje. It was now just after 5 and my return was warmly received by the reception. I had a chance to pick Celeste this time. She is 21 and from Paraguay. Great BJ, DATY and multiple positions, wonderful. Very sweet girl, my dick misses her already. Total damage was the same leaving me enough for one more party at the Paraguay. Next day , around 6pm ,there was a much smaller selection. I picked a young lady with dyed blond hair. I'm embarrassed I can't remember her name. Nothing to complain about, she was very nice and she had some great moves. I left my last 300 for the house and 350 for her.
In short, you guys living down here have the life! Beautiful women, amazing steak and the best wine....all on ridiculous discount! I know there are many adventures to be had in BA and I really look forward to a time when I can really spend some Real time there..
In the meantime- if you are visiting short time in BA, check out Humano - you can't go wrong.
Gringo6667
11-24-14, 21:35
Thanks for the information, it is appreciated. Went to Paraguay 820 this afternoon. The place is indeed clean and very safe since its right between some big hotels and just a few blocks from the shopping area. I would recommend this place to anybody who is concerned about safety or cleanliness, or who just arrived in BA.
Paid 300 for the room and 300 for a quick session with Victoria. Quite young and pretty. She was not very keen on making it last long, which kind of threw me off. Session was not much longer than 15 minutes. No DATY, not even touching her there. So I just banged her and got dressed. I don't know how things work here, should I have offered more money or did I just pick the wrong girl?
Also there was no hot water, so no hot tub. No tip, even though I will return to meet a different lady. Perhaps I should not pick the prettiest next time.
Gringo Verde
11-25-14, 11:01
I was there yesterday afternoon too and had pretty much the same experience as Gringo 6667. Three chicas in the line-up, none of them anything special. I chose a young blond and gave the receptionist 300 for the house. The blond came back, rubbed my back for a few minutes, and announced that was the end of the "massage" and if I wanted anything else that was 300 more. I opted for "participation" which turned out to be very one-sided; no work and no sensuality from her at all. Long story short, I was back on the sidewalk less than 30 minutes after I walked in the door.
The facilities are a cut above most but who wants to use the Jacuzzi if there is no hot water?
In Umano's defense, Monday was a holiday and The A Team had the day off. But their business model is designed to separate you from 600 pesos and out the door as quickly as possible.
GV.
Went there at 6:30 pm. They said there were only two girls. One is busy (Delphine)and the one that was presented to me was cute. This was my first stop and I went looking for a specific girl and she obviously was not there. In hindsight I should have stayed and had a "massage" from the solid 7 (Juliana) that was there. Instead I walked out and went to other places in the area with no luck. I will be back tomorrow afternoon.
Went back on Thursday at 3 PM. There were 5 girls. I chose Celeste. I have seen her before. She is cute. Early 20s. A solid 8 in looks. She is a good actor/performer. Like any pro, she will deliver but only as much as you demand. 450 for the house. I don't mess with a pretend massage in a place like this. Instead, I offer to give the girl a massage. Most really dig it and helps break the ice. She asked what I want and I replied with my best sultry voice, "todo". The session was good. I was a bit rushed (not her) and I gave her 300. She asked for 450. 300 is all I had and she had to settle for it.
I would repeat and if I spend close to an hour with her, I would pay her 400 or 450. I said I will next time and intend to keep my word.
WorldTravel69
02-11-16, 19:07
Massage 550p hour. I did not have enough money for the 600p bBJ, so I paid 400p for a HJ and a little bare titty rubbing.
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