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StrayLight
11-04-06, 00:55
I was cruising the various escort and massage website looking for something a little off the beaten track -- as is my wont -- when I came across this ad...

Comienza con relajamiento completo de la musculatura corporal (reflexología plantal, piernas, abdomen, plexo solar, rostro why espalda) why para continuar con las terapias eróticas denominadas:

"Hedonistas"

Que se realiza con boca, lengua why senos, masajeando el cuerpo completo, combinando con una reversión sanguínea hacia genitales, ano why escroto, para culminar en un masaje testicular denominado.

"La Danza de los testículos"...

The Dance of the Testicles....!?!?!?

Guys, any woman who uses the phrase, "Dance of the Testicles" in her ad is going to get at least one visit from me, no matter how old, ugly, or fat she is, and (almost) no matter how much she charges (sorry Capt Dave). For any woman who can come up with a phrase like that has piqued my curiosity past the point of no return. And so I went.

It was not an auspicious beginning. Nancy works out of an apartment on Bartholome Mitre that I can only describe as a shithole. And although she is not much to look at on her ad, she is even less to look at in person. Kind of fat, in a slovenly sort of way, with a homely face.

Nonetheless, I didn't walk out. I explained to her in my best pidgeon Spanish that back in the U. S., my testicles were rather well-known for their dancing, and that they were both looking forward to a few turns around the dance floor with her. She seemed pleased with this, and led me to a crappy little room with a massage table and a very low bed.

After my shower she had me lie on my back, and she started massaging my feet and lower legs. I could tell from the start that therapeutic massage was not her forte, and could only hope that her testicle dancing skills were better.

She kept me on my back for quite a bit, and although she played with the boys from time to time, she never really showed the sort of deep knowledge of teasing and playing that we hand job connoisseurs love and look forward to.

Eventually she turned me over, and then things got a bit more interesting. First she took off her top and began massaging my back and ass with her tits. It was OK, but nothing to write home about. But then she began sucking my toes and feet, which I really liked. And after that she moved up the legs, and sure as shit began the old "el beso negro", which I indicated an approval of with deep groans of pleasure.

Then she did a weird thing. She had me move over to the small, low bed and sit with my legs spread and facing the room. I thought she was going to fuck me or something, but no...

Instead, she pulled the massage table closer, sat on it, and began giving me...a foot job. She took her left foot, and slowly inserted her big toe in my ass (very well lubed, of course), and then took her right foot and began stroking me and rubbing my balls and whatnot. And actually jerking me off with her foot. And then I realized...this is the "dance of the testicles." LOL! She was smiling and giggling and just full of herself, and I was smiling, too. Sort of.

For me it was kind of fun for a while, but then it started to get old after a bit. But just as it was getting old, she got down off the table and kneeled in front of me. She put one finger up my ass...buried her face in my balls and started sucking them for all she was worth...and with her other hand she began a hand job.

Let me just say that up until this point, the woman had shown some nice technical skills, but no real sense of timing or how to really create an erotic event. But for a few brief moments as she sucked and stroked and prodded, she seemed to have it.

But then she went into blow job mode, and more or less lost it. Her blow job was not really good; it was more just for show, with her hand doing all the work. And she made it real clear that she was not about to take a load in her mouth.

But...hey, it was still fun. She probably spent 10 or 15 minutes alternating between a blow job and ball sucking -- all the while with a finger up my ass -- until I finally shot a load all over the place.

My total time on station at that point was just over an hour.

For most of you I would say this: don't go. She's fat, she's ugly, and she's over-priced ($130 pesos for a nominal 90 minutes). But you know how it is when your curiosity gets the best of you, and so for me it was worth it just to find out what the fuck "the dance of the testicles" was all about. But trust me, I won't go again.

As Walter Winchell might might have put it, "There are 8 million tails in the Naked City, and this has been one of them."

SL

BA Luvr
11-04-06, 01:55
Thanks for taking one for the team SL. I also had seen the ad and wondered what it was all about. Now I know.

I had tried Carla from the same site, and like you, was disappointed (see thread) So far, it's not very encouraging. Anyone have a good experience on TodoMasajes to report?

Bjoel
11-04-06, 02:18
Thanks for the info. I am coming down to BsAs for the first time in a week. I was very interested in the todo masajes site, especially that of Nancy. Any massage recommendations besides Martina and Gabi? Especially interested in prostatico and besos negros.

Capt Dave
11-04-06, 03:47
SL.

You have earned yet another stripe - job well done!

Many perspiring minds (including mine! Have mused over the DOTT, and now we can relax and avoid having to endure it ourselves!

In recognition of your fortitude, I hope the pussy gods reward you well on your next venture off the beaten track!

Saludos!

David

StrayLight
11-04-06, 20:43
Many perspiring minds (including mine! Have mused over the DOTT, and now we can relax and avoid having to endure it ourselves!Well, you know, "enduring it" is not, I think, really the right way to think about it. I mean, it's not how I meant to convey it. Because it was fun and it was funny. It just wasn't quite what I was hoping it would turn out to be, and it surely wasn't worth $130 pesos.

SL

Exon123
11-05-06, 03:07
I keep telling you CockSuckers that for hand jobs its Martina.

She's the best I've found to date and I know something about good hand jobs.

Hell, I give one to myself several times a day.

Exon

Coach 245
11-07-06, 15:46
Thanks for helping the team out and enduring the DOTT as Captain Dave calls it! LOL I appreciate the complete review. I am glad you enjoyed the trip off the beaten path. It makes the path more clear for many of the rest of us! Thanks again!

Coach